What makes you attractive?

‘What makes you attractive?’.. or let me rephrase this “What makes you attractive beyond looks and hormonal cocktails?” What I am about to tell you is not the typical BS you hear from most folks. But in order to answer this question let me take you on a little journey through my life. All of my life I was blessed with men who fell deeply in love with me, emotionally and sexually... I own a cracked paper box with heart-warming poetry by one of my lovers; thoughtful, philosophical letters I shared with another lover; and a love rap song composed just for me. One of my lovers followed me to the other side of the world with the first letter of my name tattooed on his back.  And no, it wasn’t that I was a beauty queen, But...

These men didn’t fall in love with me because I was the hottest chic in town let me tell you what I believe made them really fall in love with me. #1 - I was different. I challenged them. I inspired them. I left my home when I was 19. I longed to see the world, and so I did. I loved being by myself and writing philosophical notes. I loved questioning the world and reading eye-opening books. My perspective on life intrigued my lovers. It was different, unique and challenging to them. They were attracted to these qualities - often times subconsciously -  for they didn’t know that they were “growing themselves.”. Personal growth is the only thing your “soul” is yearning for. In a recent study it was found that ‘unique’ often equals “most attractive”. Learning to see our uniqueness cultivates it and makes us naturally attractive. #2 - I was independent. I learned to embrace the desire for my own company at an early age. When others needed friends to be happy or brave I went on doing things by myself.  I was never afraid of being alone.  A crucial quality for any relationship if you ask me. Most lovers depend on their other half to be happy.  They become like blood-sucking vampires to their beloved draining the relationship off its life-giving juice. And here is another, important thing: I never compromised on things that really mattered to me. Never ever! This challenged my lovers, but the attraction to this independence of mine was bigger than the fear of it. Independence stands for self-love and inner strength. Qualities which are very attractive to many of us on a subconscious level. #3 - I was never interested in the facade, only in the heart. Six packs, symmetric faces or money machines were not of interest to me. I was interested in the heart. Always. I looked beyond the physical attraction of my lovers. And they felt it. They felt drawn to me because I was genuinely interested in their hearts. Everyone longs to be seen for who they truly are. Most people in today’s world are obsessed with the facade.  But beauty is fleeting. Only the soul lasts forever. Here is what YOU can do to raise your attractiveness: #1 Follow your heart: Don’t just make it a cheesy quote. Do it. #2 Expand your horizons: travel, read, go on adventures & question the world. #3 Don’t run away from challenges: overcome them. #4 Love yourself & life: No matter how messed up it is. Own it. Very sexy. #5 Get real: Dive into personal development. Cultivate the “real & unique you”